Know Your Stars:Naruto!
by KonohaShinobi
Summary: It's know your stars, with a twist, guest references from alot of cartoons and anime! Insanity and randomness!
1. Naruto Insanity Part 1

Know your Stars Super Spoofs Part 1

MV: Naruto Hates ramen!  
Naruto: I love ramen you mangy voice!  
MV:Naruto Doesn't want to become the next Hokage!  
Naruto: Yeah I do, I want to be noticed, Believe it!  
MV: Naruto Hates HInata and loves Sakura Naruto: Yeah!  
(Hinata goes back stage and starts crying)  
Hinata: I THOUGHT WHAT WE HAD WAS SPECIAL!  
NarutoMV Likes pretty ponies and has a collection in his closet.  
Naruto: How did you find...? NO I DON'T!  
MV: Naruto Loves Sasuke, That's why he wanted to find him.  
Naruto: NO I DON'T!  
MV:Naruto Keeps a picture of Iruka in his pocket at all times Naruto: Yup, He's my favorite sensei MV: Naruto He killed Akamaru, and Shino's Kikai bugs (Kiba and Shino come on stage)  
Kiba: I knew it fox boy, you must die!  
Shino: Repent for my dead friends!  
(Beat up Naruto in a dust cloud fight and leave him there)  
MV:NarutoNeeds extra money so he does sexy no jutsu at clubs and strips for cash (Kakashi stands up)  
Kakashi: So you were the girl I met at the bar and tried to hit on Naruto: No, that was Sakura.  
Kakashi: Oh, no wonder she seemed unattractive and unappealing (Sakura gets up from her seat)  
Sakura: Why you pervert!  
(Smacks Kakashi in the face)  
MV: Naruto Reads Harry Potter Naruto: Who in the hell is Harry Potter?  
(Harry pops out of nowhere)  
Harry: I am!  
Naruto: HOLY SHIT!  
( Harry randomly multiplies and sings his version of badgerbadger)  
AH, a potter, potter, potter, potter, potter,potter, weasley, weasley (Gets kunai in face and falls down)  
MV: That was random, oh well.  
MV: Naruto, stole the whole i'm short, annoying but cute look from Ed Elric from full metal alchemist Naruto: NO I DIDN'T!  
(Ed pops out of nowhere)  
ED: Yeah you did, Eat this !  
(Turns metal arm into blade)  
Naruto: Holy Shit!  
( Beats him to a bloody pulp)  
Naruto: Ow!

What will happen next? Send a review please. 


	2. Naruto Insanity Part 2

Know your Stars Super Spoofs Part 2

Back to Naruto.  
Naruto: Ow, dammit!  
MV: Hey your falt,hehe MV: Naruto's gay Naruto: no i'm not!  
MV: Yes you are!  
Naruto: no i'm not!  
MV: yes you are!  
Naruto: No i'm not!  
MV: No your not!  
Naruto: Yes i am and that's final!  
Naruto: Wait what, dammit!  
MV: Feel my power of reverse psycology Ramen appears out of nowhere)  
MV: Naruto, don't eat that ramen right next to you Naruto: Must resist erge to eat ramen!  
Naruto: Aw, hell with it.  
(Eats ramen then holds stomach)  
Naruto: What's happening!  
MV: I told you so, there was ten pounds of laxitive in it.  
Naruto: Must find bathroom!  
MV: NO bathrooms here! I made sure of it.  
Naruto: Damn you!  
MV: HAHAHA!  
(Naruto falls unconcious)  
MV: Hurray!  
(taken off stage and tied to chair)

Wel next is Sasuke so R&R, Sayonara! 


	3. Sasuke Insanity Part 1

Know your Stars Super Spoofs

sorry for the late update, and for my other two stories i won't update until i get more then 10 reviews

Disclamer: Naruto is owned by Dattebayo and Masashi Kishimoto

Sasuke: I don't see the point why i'm here.  
MV: The point your here is you get humiliated of in front of a internet audience or, (snaps fingers and fan girls appear)  
you get mauled by your dozens of fangirls Sasuke: I-I'd rather get get humiliated in front of the internet.  
MV: Good, now on to business MV: Sasuke is secretly in love with Neji Sasuke: I am not gay!  
Neji: Neither am I!  
MV: are too!  
Sasuke: are not!  
MV: are too!  
Sasuke: are not!  
MV: are not!  
Sasuke: are too and that's final, wait a second dammit, that's the samething Naruto did to me in your last story MV: Sorry, writers block MV: Sasuke is hot for Naruto Sasuke: No i'm not ! that was just an accidental kiss MV: In front of everyone you know Sasuke : Ok, heh? (sweatdrop)  
MV: Weird, i'm hungry, i'm gonna get some popcorn (intermission, stay tuned for the next part of the chapter) 


	4. Sasuke Insanity Part 2

Know Your Stars Super Spoofs

Sasuke Insanity Part 2

(A/N: Sorry for the late update, it's been hectic, but here it is!)

MV: Welcome back to Know Your Stars Super Spoofs!

Sasuke: I still don't see why I have to be here.

_**(Stares at Sasuke with intense hate)**_

MV: Well I just don't like you; I respect Sasu/Saku fans, as I am one myself,

But I have always wanted to knock you down a few pegs off the cool list.

_**(Sasuke fan girls start rioting)**_

MV: Okay, Let's Begin! Sasuke loves Itachi!

Sasuke: What are you talking about? That bastard killed off the entire Uchiha clan!

_**(Itachi comes out from backstage)**_

Itachi: Oh little brother I missed you too!_** (Hugs Sasuke)**_

Sasuke: Oh what am I saying, I missed you aniki! _**(Hugs back)**_

_**(Sasuke and Itachi are watching a video playing on the screen in the background)**_

MV: This is what an OOC fan girl would do in a fan fiction story to Itachi and Sasuke, shocking isn't it?

_**(Looks at Sasuke and Itachi twitching)**_

MV: Okay… Uh let's move on _**(clears throat)**_

MV: Sasuke loves Sakura and wants her to have his babies!

Sasuke: I do not want to have hot and pleasuring sex with my beloved Sakura-chan!

MV: _**(staring at Sasuke after he said that)**_

MV: Okay… now, Sasuke has a crush on Orochimaru!

_**(Orochimaru comes from backstage and hugs Sauske)**_

Orochimary: Oh Sasuke-kun, I knew you cared!

Sasuke: Get off me you old bat! _**(Punches Orochimaru in the nose)**_

MV: Now since Sasuke didn't comply with our little deal ….

_**(presses a red button and fan girls pour into the room)**_

Random Fan Girls: Oh Sasuke-kun we love you!

MV: _**(Watches Sasuke getting buried under piles of fan girls)**_

MV: What a fitting end for Sasuke Uchiha..

Well next up Haruno Sakura! See you next time folks!

A?N: well that's's it, the last chapter of Sasuke Insanity, Next up is Sakura Insanity, make sure to press that nice purple button on the left please!

Or Kenji will castrate you in your sleep! That, or if you do review, you get to be featured in the next chapter! Well Ja ne!


	5. Sakura Insanity: It's Late I Know

Know Your Stars: Naruto!

(A/N: Sorry for the delay fans, I'm now in high school, and taking honors classes, evil... yes I know, but here's the next chapter)

Sakura Insanity! (It's only in one part this time folks; I've had requests for Hinata and Tenten so I'll make this brief)

MV: Welcome to today's segment of KYS: Naruto! ... Now to introduce our next victim… I... mean, guest, Haruno Sakura!

(Audience starts cheering)

MV: Wow we have a great audience out here tonight!

Sakura: Hello Fans! Shannaro!

Crowd: Take it off! Woo Hoo!

MV: This isn't the Sakura Striptease Session folks, that's tomorrow night…

part of the audience leaves

Sakura: Wait, what strip session?

MV: Oh nothing really, Well, Know Your Stars…

MV: Sakura- has a really big forehead!

Sakura: Hey!

MV: Sakura- once kissed Ino and loved it!

Sakura: Hey, who told you about me and Ino? ... Wait, how did you know about that??

Audience Woos in reply

MV: Sakura, only hates Karin because Sasuke is stealing Karin from her..

Sakura: I hate that bitch! She stole my Sasuke-kun!

MV: Actually you should be saying that to Naruto and the Yaoi Fangirls!

points at a bunch of girls holding up signs

Fangirls: NaruSasu 4Ever!

MV: Well after that being said we shall have a brief intermission while our sponsor announces our latest product.

Scene cuts to Ninja brand Cereals

MV walks behind stage and grabs a soda from the mini fridge

MV: God, I really love my job! takes off dark shadow suit and reveals himself to be…

Fangirlish Scream

Fangirls: OMG its KonohaShinobi!

KS: This is the reason I use alias all the time…

Stage director comes backstage

SD: Five minutes Mr. Shinobi!

KS: Come on Kenji, we've known each other for years; call me Kono, that's what everyone else does.

SD: Well you did create me, wait, does that mean? That you're my father?

KS: Nope, Well if you think about it, I'm more of your guardian…

SD: Oh…then, Five minutes Uncle Kono!

puts on dark suit

MV: I've got another kid calling me uncle, oh well, what can you do?

Intermission ends

MV: Welcome back to KYS: Naruto!

Crowd: Jerry! Jerry!

MV: Okay, who keeps messing up the audiences emotional and call cue cards!

SD: I'll make a check on that later…

MV: Anyway… Sakura- cheated on Naruto with Sai!

Sakura: I never dated Naruto! Especially Sai!

Sai and Naruto pop up

Sai: Sakura we have good news! Penis!

MV: Why does he say penis after every sentence?

Sakura: I never really wanted to look into that…

Naruto: Well, anyway, Sai and I are getting married!

audience, host and guest start having twitching fits

(Watches big screen pull up)

MV: That was really scary…

Sakura: So this is what some people put into fan fiction?

MV: I'm afraid so... Well, Sakura- slept with every guy in the Naruto Universe!

Sakura: …

MV: Who wasn't dead before the first episode or Chuunin exams…?

(Watches 4thHokagexSaku and ObitoxSaku shippers leave the audience)

Sakura: I can live with that…Wait this means I slept with Orochimaru?

MV: Sakura- likes long tongues in the right places!

Sakura: It's my secret fetish!

(Audience and host stare at her)

Sakura: What? I'm happy I got that into the open!

MV: Coughs Now that mental image is forever scarring my brain…

Pushes button to release millions of drawings of Sasuke and Naruto Yaoi Comic Smut

MV: Holds up an umbrella

Sakura: NO! It burns! I'm melting!

(Watches Sakura melt and turn into a puddle)

MV: Oh well, she's done; tune in next time for the next segment of…

Crowd: Know Your Stars: Naruto!

MV: Good Night Everyone! Make sure to press that button on the left of your screen, I'm running out of ideas, so post this review on a 5 by 10 review screen(Size doesn't matter) titled:

Your Name

Your Review

To me, KonohaShinobi! Ja ne People!


	6. Hinata Insanity: Short isn't It?

Know Your Stars: Naruto!

Chapter 6- Hinata Insanity

Talking

_(Inner __HInata__ Speaking)_

MV: Welcome Audience, to another edition of KYS: Naruto.

"Today's guest is one you all know and love- Hyuuga Hinata!"

Hinata: Hello… everyone, it is nice to be here tonight.

(Audience Claps)

MV: Well, I see that our audience is excited today!

"Now, let's begin"

MV: Hinata- has breast implants!

Hinata: Ano, but these are natural…

(Half the audience starts hooting while the female half stares at them in disgust)

MV: Ahem…

"Hinata- Loves Naruto!"

Audience: AWWWW!

MV: Now it is time folks, for Fanfiction Vision!

(Random video screen comes down from the ceiling)

Naruto: I love you too, Hinata-chan!

Hinata: Screw the sappy stuff, let's get busy!

(Many random sexual activities later)

(Hinata and Naruto, two days later, walking through Konoha)

Sakura: Hi Naruto! I've decided to quit my bitching about Sasuke leaving and settling for you.

(Hinata runs in front of Sakura and punches her in the face so hard she flies through a wall)

(People watch as she picks up Naruto)

Hinata: See, this is mine! THIS IS WHERE MY BABIES COME FROM!

(View screen rises up and NaruHina fans rejoice)

MV: (Staring at Hinata)

"Ahem, um... yeah, this is what happens in fan fictions when crazy authors get sugar high…."

_(Inner __Hinata__Hehe__, that's where you get yours Sakura…)_

MV: Now, let's continue our sugar crazed fanatic rant about Hinata…

Hinata: What?

MV: I mean… uh, Oh look, Naruto in boxers!

Hinata: Where? (watches her look left and right)

Naruto: Oi, Author- sama, can I have my clothes back now?

MV: Naruto, I suggest you run… NOW!

(Watches Hinata run after Naruto in a leaving a dust trail)

MV: Well, you don't see that every day…

" Goodnight everyone!"


	7. Gaara Insanity: Part 1

Chapter 7- Gaara Insanity! Part 1

(A/N: This is one of the most delayed chapters I've ever done, along with one of the longest, since I really hate long winded discussions, oh well, Enjoy!)

**Warning: Contains references to Naruto, Hellsing, Fourth Wall, Dane Cook, Jim Carrey and Sesame Street. This text is not recommended for the weak of heart, or children. **

MV: Sorry for the delay everyone, but welcome back to another hilarious installment of KYS: Naruto.

MV: Well, I have another victim…um…person, in the studio today.

"Please welcome, Sabaku no Gaara!"

Audience Claps

Gaara walks out across the stage and takes a seat

MV: Welcome Gaara, do you have anything to say to the audience before we start our hilarious rant about many stupid things that the fans think of you?

Gaara: Silence

MV: Okay then, let's begin our crazy, fun- filled night!

MV: Gaara- Is afraid of cats!

Audience stares

MV: What, it's a classic?

"Gaara is afraid of cats because he thinks that they'll use his sand like a litter box."

Gaara: silent

Gaara fan girl: You suck!

Audience Member: Too soon!

MV: Gaara- scares small children!

Gaara: puts on a creepy smile

MV: What the hell?

"I think all I'm doing is making him happy…"

MV: Well at least its better than the time I took Alucard to a Blood Drive.

_Flashback_

_MV: Alucard, this isn't a buffet, it's a charity event!"_

_Alucard: Bloooood! Devouring several bags of medicinal blood_

_MV: God, Integra is so gonna have my ass for this one…_

_End Flashback_

MV: Well, trying to forget the incidents of the past, let's go back to teasing the sand toting red head we all know, and several busty fan girls find cute and cuddly.

MV: Gaara- has a teddy bear!

Gaara: tearing up I used to!

MV: Oh shit…

Angry Gaara fan girls start growling

MV: Here you go Gaara, don't cry. gives Gaara a teddy bear

Gaara: Hugs it and smiles

MV: Well this worked out well.

Gaara fan girls cool down

"Now, Gaara- wanted to crush Rock Lee with his sand!"

Gaara: That was true, I mean, come on!

"Who wouldn't want to kill that carbon copy of Maito Gai?"

MV: You've got a point there.

"Well you didn't want to kill him afterwards, right?"

Gaara: Meh, it's not worth my time.

MV: Then why the hell did you save him by killing Kimimaru?

Gaara: Hell, the producers though it would be a good show of faith for the anime, showing that my character has changed through the course of the series.

Kool Aid Man breaks through the wall

Kool Aid Man: Oh yeah!

MV: What the hell?

Manager walks on stage

Manager: Um, sir… we have a situation…

MV: Hell yeah we have a situation!

"Why did the fucking Kool Aid Man just break through the studio wall?"

Manager: I believe it's because Gaara here broke the fourth wall with his little speech.

MV: But why the Kool Aid Man?

"Yes I supposed we should elaborate on the stories humor through a visible metaphor, but really, the Kool Aid Man?"

Manager: Would you prefer a roller coaster crashing through the wall?

MV: No way in hell I'm risking an outbreak of Uber-SARS.

Manager: Then settle for the Kool Aid Man, he's the only guy who we could get on such short notice.

MV: slaps forehead Fine!

MV: snaps fingers

Nothing happens

"What the hell, why isn't this working?"

Manager: Sir, I think it isn't working due to the fact that it only works when the author does it. It is his…

MV: I don't want another jug of powdered beverage breaking through this wall again. So I suggest you do not finish that sentence.

Kool Aid Man breaks through wall again

Kool Aid Man: Oh yeah!

MV: eye twitching

Manager: Well I think we'll continue this story after our gracious host here gets to a hospital.

MV: If you excuse me, I have to find a giant sledgehammer, so I can finally kill that giant beverage!

Kool Aid Man: Oh no!

MV: pulls out a sledgehammer

"Oh yeah, bitch!"

MV starts chasing around Kool Aid Man

Manager: Okay then… Gaara, have anything to say to the audience?

Gaara: This chapter of KYS: Naruto has been brought to you by the letter K and the letter S, and the number 23!

MV: Hell no, we do not need Jim Carrey popping up in his acting role from the first and hopefully only horror movie he's been in. But I think the Sesame Street reference is cute.

Kool Aid Man breaks through the wall again

MV: Come back here and die like a man you bowl of fruit punch!

MV: This has been Part 1 of "Gaara Insanity"; please stay tuned for Part 2.

Moral of the Story: MV really hates things breaking through his walls, and Kool Aid, especially Kool Aid…

A/N: Please read and review!


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